❤ Welcome to Addicted to Love ❤
Updated: Aug 16, 2018
I just launched the inaugural episode of my podcast "Addicted to Love"...
A very warm welcome to you! Now this is a very special moment. I just launched my podcast "Addicted to Love" and I am so excited. This podcast has been months in the making and really is the result of my very own journey. I used to be a Love Addict and for the past couple of years, I took a deep dive and committed to finding out, what it was inside of myself that attracted rejection, the wrong partners and ultimately not succeeding in finding true lasting love or at least fall in love with myself.
Ever since my life is no longer controlled by this painful addiction, I have felt a deep desire to help those who face the same battles. I truly wish for you to start living a life in a continuous state of empowerment, an unshakable confidence, where you show up in a unique expression of who you are as a woman. My work is mainly addressed to women, as I believe that being a women myself, I can probably serve women better. This does not mean I don't work with men, but I just felt more confident with women. If you are a guy and you are reading about my work; please please continue. You are just as welcome and I do want to help and support you if you wish that. As a matter of fact, whenever guys hear about my work, many of them say "but guys deal with this too!". And yes, you are right, no matter the gender, we all deal with the same pain and hurt. So please stay and take advantage of all the amazing content I will be putting out. Feel free to reach out to me, as I said, you are just as welcome!
Now first thing first. Head over to my site www.addictedtolovepodcast.com and make sure to subscribe to the show so you won't be missing any episodes. This podcast will provide you with everything you need to know about love addiction, so you can create a high level of awareness because awareness will give us choice. I’ll share with you the powerful and successful tools that helped me break free from unfulfilling relationships. In doing so, you’ll inhabit a whole new level of self-love, self-confidence and passion for life. That’s the place where everything is possible and where you can build a life you truly love. Together we will figure out who you are if you are not running after love. Instead, love will come find you. I am so happy you are here, and I am excited for our time spent together.
You might be wondering, why I am doing this podcast. I have 15 years’ experience in feeling lost, alone, disappointed, disillusioned and in pain, as a result of failed relationships and a never-ending feeling of not being good enough. For the past couple of years, I took a deep dive and committed to finding out, what it was inside of myself that attracted rejection, the wrong partners and ultimately not succeeding in finding true lasting love or at least fall in love with myself. At some point I hit rock bottom, feeling that if I’m not going to be loved right now, I am actually going to die. My life depended on making a positive shift and taking a new direction.
In this moment of awakening I finally understood what it takes to stop that form of suffering and to move into a place of radical self-love and acceptance. In my experience we can’t find true love unless we realize that the person we actually have to fall in love with first, is our self.
I myself am a recovering Love Addict. I say recovering because I think that it would be a total illusion to assume that I have fully recovered. I can say with clarity though that I am very far ahead in the process. Generally overcoming Love Addiction doesn’t mean that your relationship will never experience any codependent or unhealthy dynamic anymore. It means that you will no longer be controlled by it. That’s a big thing, trust me. Because if Love Addiction runs our life, it really means that we are not. My life changed in so many ways since I am no longer driven by that compulsion to find, keep and feel loved at all times. Today my life is a self-mastered art piece and I want you to experience the same.
I am starting the ‘addicted to love’ podcast with a very heartfelt commitment to you: I am here to help you dare to show up for yourself. To get clear on your behavior that contributes to unfulfilling relationships. To understand what it is that makes us run after love & often compromise quickly in order to get that next shot, that next rush of pleasure. Together we will find the courage to work through love addiction with the very tools that have helped me turning the rough land of victimhood into the fruitful soil of becoming the artist of your own life. This is what the “addicted to love” podcast is all about; it’s about choosing yourself first. It’s about the courage to go beyond just coping with life and being exposed to circumstances that seem out of our control. We will learn to set standards, to trust ourselves, to make healthy choices and to no longer only depend on outside attention, approval & validation.
So, let’s see if this podcast will add value for you. Let’s start with a couple of questions for you to ponder on and when you read them, just place your hand on your heart so you can tune in and really feel these answers.
Here we go:
Can you honestly say who you are in your core, in your essence, if you are not running after love? Do you already live a life of purpose and fulfillment? Have you already found your significant other that makes your heart beat and your life colorful? Are you able to happily live on your own, in solitude without master-crafting a plan to get that next date? Do you look into the mirror and say, “I love you, you absolutely rock?”. Do you stand firm in your beliefs, values and standards without compromising them at the potential threat of losing love? Are you your very own best raving fan and incredible role model for your children, friends and family when it comes to loving? Are you experiencing deep emotional and sexual intimacy with yourself or a person you trust and share love with?
If you can’t say yes to these questions then I truly hope you will stick with me and I invite you to join me and my elite team of experts who will provide you with their personal stories, best kept secrets & practical advice that you will be able to use in your life and relationships immediately. Trust me, this ride will not only be about overcoming love addiction, it is about building a life you love and together we will crack open the lid to real empowerment and equip you with
everything you need to make that happen. So, stick with me and I’ll hook you up!!
In this first episode I am briefly introducing the topic Love Addiction
and then of course we will talk about it in details over a couple of following episodes.
Fact is, most people would never combine the words Love and Addiction. It is in fact the least recognized form of addiction. On the other hand, probably one of the biggest of human kind and leads - as any other addiction - to great suffering. I am not surprised if you haven’t given much thought about whether you might be addicted to love because the very nature of Love Addiction is denial. Often, we lack the awareness around this subject. We don’t know that we are addicted to love, and we do not see the problems our behaviour causes. We fail to recognize the fact that we are the common denominator in our failed relationships, where we easily and readily put the blame on our dates, lovers, partners or anyone else we are entangled with.
Often, we find ourselves in a position of a victim and cannot understand how we continuously attract emotionally unavailable or even abusive partners. This does not mean that it is our fault. None of this is about fault. It just means that we failed to look at what we contributed to a situation, what our part in it is, where we did not take full responsibility for our own well-being. Denial is so strong because it allows us to avoid dealing with our desperate problematic behaviour, feelings and unmet needs that lie beneath it all.
There are so many layers to love addiction but one thing that describes it pretty well is that it is like a “compulsion to find, keep and feel loved at all times”. It’s really as if your focus in life is about getting that next shot of romance, that next shot of attention, just a little bit more of the fantasy of finding your soul-mate. We often repeat the same cycle: we are happy when we experience love & connection, in heaven really. The moment we separate from a date or a lover or even our partner, we can start to feel uneasy and we give into that urge to reconnect, so we can ensure to still be loved and validated. If there is an extended period of separation, we start to feel quite agitated. If we still don’t get to reconnect, obsession might kick in – that’s when we find ourselves texting too much, calling again or even show up where the person might be, drive by their house and so on. If we still fail to reconnect at that point, we do everything it takes to change that. That’s when we compromise our own values, beliefs & standards and we do that until we get the confirmation, attention, validation and ultimately (what we perceive as) love that we deeply long for. There is nothing wrong with wanting to connect and be intimate with someone. However, there is an all-deciding difference between true mature compassionate love and love addiction which mostly is compulsive & neurotic.
Love for me was a way to fill up an internal emptiness, a void. It temporarily took away some of my deep-rooted pain and it made me feel alive, worthy and loved. For a moment I was able to escape my deep loneliness and isolation and it let me forget about my fears and anxiety that I carried inside of myself. When with my guy, I felt so connected, as if all of a sudden, my life had meaning. I would forget everything around me until I was alone again. It really helped me to control my feelings. Even only to romanticize, to day-dream about him or us, gave me a great feeling. I would often in my mind have a whole movie going on about how we met by chance on the fields where I was walking. He just looked so beautiful with the sun going down and he would ask me with his sexy voice something like this:
„I have been looking for you! “.
Even just fantasizing gave me a new rush of pleasure, a “high” really. It allowed me to have a break from what I was tired and unwilling or unable to feel. Unfortunately, there is no way around feeling what we try not to feel. Feeling however is a true art and we need to learn it just as everything else. Once we know how to feel, once we truly have access to feelings, it is the absolute best thing that we can learn. For me as a woman it was like coming home once I started to recognize, honor and feel my feelings. It’s a skill that will prep you for any situation in life. But we get to that point in time.
Tomorrows episode is called: is it hot sex or love addiction? An exciting topic I can’t wait to talk with you about. In further episodes we will also be talking about traits and consequences of a life lived with an addiction to love. We will be talking about the fascinating reasons why we are addicted to love, and I will share with you exactly WHY it is so vital to overcome love addiction. Not only will you learn the differences between true authentic love and destructive love but you will also learn how to actually work through it and finally start living a life that gifts you with a deeply emotional and truly fulfilling intimate relationship with yourself or your loved ones. I am excited to meet with you tomorrow.
Have a great day!